Mad Scientist's Journal: Day 53

10:04am: had such a nice dream of being snuggled in a warm blanket; woke up to near suffocation as I discovered one of the 'pet projects' of the animal husbandry team had gotten loose. Nothing like being smothered by a eight-foot-by-six-foot living blanket. Unfortunately, it made its way to my room via the kitchen, based on the bits of egg and cheese on what passes for its snout.

11:32am: sent the telepresence device to the tarmac to meet the new hire: mid-30's, science background, looked reasonably strong. If only we made the TP device a bit shorter, or delayed the meeting a bit... wasn't aware those helicopter blades dipped that low while they were spinning. Not looking forward to telling Janice to put away the in-processing forms.

2:52pm: appears the experiments with augmenting coral to ward off bleaching are not going to trial any time soon; while the small creatures were able to retain their vivid colors, a mis-spliced gene has turned their gentle tendrils into razor-sharp slicing machines. It would do little good to the scuba industry if their pictures were photobombed with their partner's body parts.

5:08pm: tried the robotic massage machine, to ease some of my tension. Went well until it attempted to distribute more oil... overly-lubricated mechanical arms and disrobed bodies do not mix well; at least I can skip my colonoscopy this year...

6:45pm: dinner - eggplant parmigiana, used the home-grown tomatoes in the sauce, now that the botany team dissected the habanero DNA. Quite happy to have little to worry (or garments/furniture/carpet) to replace; everything was nice and safe. Had dessert, for once - ice cream, served simply with chocolate syrup and malted milk powder. Usually I don't have this luxury.

7:03pm: so much for that pair of pants... and my favorite chair. It appears the eggplant was developed for lactose-intolerance in mind, and it actively (and I mean actively) seeks out lactose and neutralizes it.

9:47pm: Trying to work out the algorithm for popular music. Mixing the styles of the current chart topping artists isn't producing anything suitable for radio, but may be useful to the sonic weapons lab; a 2-second loop of Justin Bieber at 120 decibels and three octaves higher than normal had little trouble demolishing the sound lab.

12:02am: closing this journal entry; I remain dedicated to my plans of world domination, if only I could again get a properly cooked breakfast. Until my next entry, this is Theodore M. Strandimore, signing off.