My Son Is Becoming a Feminist!
My son is five and he is infatuated with Dr. Seuss right now. I don't have any major problems with Dr. Seuss aside from the fact that some of his creatures freak me out. Like the Zizzer Zazzer Zuzz - that thing is creepy.
In the same book as that terrible creature, One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish, there is a page featuring this little critter with its billowing feathers:
I don't know if this sweet looking beast has a name, I can't remember, but as my son was tracing it from a photocopy and then painstakingly coloring it with his fancy gel pens, he kept repeating "All girls who like to brush and comb should have a pet like this at home." And there is it - a teachable moment!
This line has always bothered me, but whatever, it was the 60's or something, maybe the 50's, I can't be bothered to look, but girls did all the brushing and combing back then. That's just the way it was.
So the other day, as I was admiring his work and he was repeating the line again, I casually said, "you know, I don't really agree with that - it should say 'all kids who like to brush and comb,' don't you think? Because boys might like a pet like this, too!"
He agreed with me but we didn't really talk about it further, then the next day, after he must have mulled it over a little, he said "Yeah, I think you're right, but it should really say 'all people," because adults might like to brush this pet, too!"
Victory! My 5yo out feministed me! He out intersectioned me! He's on his way to being a thoughtful man and I could not be prouder of his thought process.
My husband and I worried briefly a few weeks ago when he said a pink plastic spoon was for girls, but when we explained to him how that kind of thinking just restricted people too much, he must have taken it to heart. Now he has decided he wants to paint one of the nine drawers on his new dresser pink, so he must be evolving in that large head of his.
It's a pleasure to watch.
How have your kids amazed you lately?
My oldest is aware in a way that made me have to learn to be more aware.
She taught me all about how me being "accepting" didn't mean anything special. "Your reward for brushing your teeth is having clean teeth mom."
Ok kid. Fine.
That kid gets it! Good job, mama. 😎
Thanks! it is good to see positive signs!
this is great, what a very clever boy you have there. I love reading stories like this, thank you for sharing it with us xx
Awww thanks; Thanks for stopping by. glad you enjoyed
My son is also 5 years old and a week ago he surprised me because he said he wanted to get married because we went to a cousin's marriage and I am delighted ... my husband looked angry and I was happy because it does not grow that it's only the girls who they want to get married ...
My little boy says he wants to be a dad all the time. Its cute. I think books and tv shows talk to the boys differently then they used to. The clothes is more gender neutral too.
That's sweet - did he tell you he wants to marry you? My son wants to marry me and when I told him I was already married to papa, he said he would marry both of us so we could live together forever. It almost makes my heart explode with all the cuteness and sweetness. I just hope he will just still talk to me and have a close relationship with me when he is an adult and I'll be happy...
Kids thought are so unpredictable coz their mind still 'purely' clean. But I do like their wild imagination sometimes too because it makes me laugh. Whenever my son-5 y/o says he wants to go to one of the planets that he has drawn, I will reply... I would like to follow! ;D
They do come up with the most amazing things...I would like to follow too!
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Its so great that you have each other to inspire one another!! Not sure i wanna brush or comb that tiny pet with big hair, lol but i like having the option even tho im an adult 😂😂😂 you know im all about youthful adulting!!
-Capn Girlpowa aka @limabeing
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STOPI really like this. My older two seemed to come out pretty neutral, but these younger two are really set in these kind of hardline ideas about "what girls and boys do." It drives me batty, so we've been working on it, and it's getting better. The 6 yo has now decided his favorite colors are black and pink. I had more rules for the older ones about tv, so maybe that's it. These two are being raised in the jungle, though, so you'd think that would balance it out.
Interesting bit is that he's always worn her dresses, and I've never said anything about it at home at all, so maybe he's unaware that's an issue in the larger culture? I did, after great hesitation, mention one time about a year ago before we went to town that some people may say mean things if he wore the dress, but I let him know that it was totally fine - it was just that there are more than a few people in this world who believe silly things. He decided to wear it anyway telling me he didn't care what anyone said, and no one said a word. He wore them for a few more months but doesn't wear them so much anymore.