What is the true fight for feminism: Rant!

in #feminism6 years ago

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I will try my best to be just and true and to make this as honest as possible.
When I started hearing about feminism, I knew it to be an agitation which was about balance and equality. Where every sex was treated as human and one sex wasn't treated like it was superior to another.

Honestly, when factions start to creep into any idea, it becomes disunited and the common goal is often hidden in warped agendas.
If we're not careful, sometimes in a bid to radically eliminate something, we only create the same thing or something worse in another form.

There was a time in the South Southern part of Nigeria when cultism is universities was rampant. People were being killed like flies. The student bodies of those universities decided to come up with a radical solution. To produce a group as radical as the cult factions, only in this case, they were meant to fight cultism.

All seemed well for a while, after a while the anti cult group actually became the terrors themselves. Students were no longer free, they started doing the same things the students wanted to eradicate. Extortion, molestation and name it. Why I shared this story is quite simple, we have to have a decisive plan of action. We shouldn't just play fire for fire, sometimes we have to be sure we're not creating a worse monster.
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Let's get started

I grew up in a place where women's rights are greatly hindered. We have never had a female governor and some other things. But, in terms of employment, the women stand a higher chance than men.

Life is all about balance, any man who is threatened by the rise of a woman who is putting in hours of work and is deserving, is a coward. I don't support a host of things, they include; cheating, assault, rape, partiality and so much more. I believe women were created to complement men and not just only do the things we can, but to also do the things we cannot do.

My mum taught me the value of respecting women. But I want to say this proverb, a woman doesn't have to drag the crown on a man's head to prove she's equal or superior, she has her own beautiful crown which makes her unique. One thing women do perfectly well that men cannot do is that women can multitask effectively.

You see, biology differentiates our anatomy and physiology which creates strengths and weaknesses in us. Be proud of what makes you different.
It hurts me when I see people claiming to fight a "system" when they need not be subject to the laws of those system in the first place.
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Generally speaking

We have crucial issues being ignored by feminists like child marriages, access to basic human rights but sadly, it seems more of a fixation on bringing other genders down. More like a war of genders. Permit my harsh narrative there, but it was how best I could express it.

I miss when life was more simple, when a child from the age of 0-5 just wanted to play with both genders (male and female) without stress. When they get to ages 6-12, they just find the opposite sex annoying and from 13 and above, attraction of same sex and opposite sex starts kicking in.

While I understand that there are jerks out there giving the men a bad name, we have to understand two things;

  • Let's not blow things out of proportion.
  • Not all men are bad.
    Men were groomed never to complain, which is why even when they're hurt or things aren't what they seem, they opt for silence.

The consequence of such is that many have gone to jail for crimes they didn't commit. Naturally, society favors women on sensitive issues which is why some women exploit the true feminist movement as a tool for personal gain. I read of a case where a guy was convicted for rape and spent years only for them to discover the lady who accused him had lied. I know someone who told a popular black figure she would scream rape if he doesn't sleep with her. Funny part was that she somehow went to his hotel room under the guise of being a fan.

That is not the first of such stories. The thing is, because of the way society is currently being reshaped, facts are hardly verified in instances like that. This is not to say predators don't exist, but they're existent in all genders. Someone said what about men who shout women down during meetings, unfair wage gap etc.

That question was honestly answered as follows; we can take a look at the kind jobs women prefer to engage in vs the total number of jobs available. Majority of women don't like coal mining as a profession, civil construction, the list goes on. Look at it this way, if a company pays women less, why are more women not even employed? Afterall it saves them money. It is because while such happens, I don't think I have experienced such.

While some fight for the true freedom of other women, we must deny that the activities of some are questionable. I believe the established feminist activists could come together and build legacies (companies, establishments etc) which truly empower women instead of looking for ones created by men to somewhat validate their claims by employing them.

Also, it would be unfair to say labor laws do not favor them when they get maternity leave to nurse a new child and the fathers get nothing. A man is conditioned to give all he has in the name of family. I also think the identities of men, not the woman beating, savage machochistic tendencies, should be allowed to exist and the identities of women should too.

I won't deny the struggles women have passed through to get to this level today, the only thing I worry is the attack of the identity of man, including the innocent ones. The fear is while fighting the "patriarchy" we need to be careful as not to create a "matriarchy" similar or worse than what is being fought.
Let us see people as people.



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You have great points especially this:

If we're not careful, sometimes in a bid to radically eliminate something, we only create the same thing or something worse in another form.

I say we've reached a truly equal society free of gender biases when the time comes that job applicants are measured based on skills alone, and companies would not need to worry about lawsuits on equal opportunity Coal mining for example, should women want a job in this area then they'd need to have the strength necessary for the job.

In the same manner that should a woman apply for a top-level executive position, she and the rest of the candidates will be assessed purely on skills. At this time, it still does exist that most institution has a preference for male leaders.

There wouldn't be any need for gender roles in the society as well. A man or a woman can take on the provider or the nurturing role without any stigma.

And maybe when that time comes, we no longer have a need for the term feminism, and replace it with humanism perhaps?

Sidenote: the maternity leave grant is more for medical purposes at the minimum, and for the child-rearing purpose for the extended one as the mother can provide milk. But I do get what you were trying to say here :)

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@dreamiely, well said. However, one quick look at our society today and we'll discover, the feminism "whitepaper" is different from what is being seen.

It's almost like a bitter divide is being politically (might I also add forcefully) created among the sexes with it seeming like a battle for superiority which shouldn't be.

And maybe when that time comes, we no longer have a need for the term feminism, and replace it with humanism perhaps?

IMHO, there is only need for humanity and not any further divide. Hoping humans one day embrace humanity negates your points so far about the "fair" fight. It further acknowledges a division being created like saying "which side are you on?"

should women want a job in this area then they'd need to have the strength necessary for the job.

This has been the argument when people talk about employment inequality. I point to the fact that there are some jobs women might not be able to take on, simply because biologically, men are better suited. Jobs such as coal mining and construction work. But, what is unfair is when people take an average from all jobs (including the ones that falls under the categories of jobs you admitted that isn't better suited for women) and say there is employment inequality.

Agree that it shouldn't be a battle of superiority. I guess this has really been a human nature tied with survival, are we inately designed to prove that we are the best? Not just in gender, but say nations, in sports etc. We seem to pick a side in whatever (in this case gender) and try to come on top.

I will ponder on these words...

I went through this lovely post line after line and all that I could pick up in larger percentage is this point;

***There is uniqueness in both male and female gender; our uniqueness is the natural distinction that can never be replaced or equaled!

Out duty I think should be to have absolute respect, honor and appreciation to those things that naturally separate the two beautiful genders!

This is absolutely lovely @ehiboss

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Thank you.

Feminism has nothing to do with the sexes.

It's a marxist (postmodernist) strategy of divide to rule.

It's about the attainment of power. Period. (no pun intended).

I understood your point perfectly well

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