Having a special needs kid is a whole new ball park in this regard, too. My littlest brother has Down's and it has been a new realm of caution because no matter how old he gets, people always have their opinions on how he should be raised and treated. My mom has been really careful about making sure he is at every doctor's appointment, for instance, to make sure she has official record that he's been examined and she's followed medical advice because he's someone who could be reported on indefinitely. What a mess!

And the whole vindictive reporting...yikes. I don't even want to get started on that, other than to observe that one thing which can really make a family vulnerable is a divorce. Or children born outside of marriage. It seems to create a rift that is exploited at every opportunity. And you have conflict within the family, disgruntled in-laws, all kinds of messy stuff; and sometimes kids report on their parents just to get back at them for something they're mad about. The whole system is one giant mess.