Are you you because of you or me?

Our personalities are amazing things, complex wonders that we take for granted. But are we who we are because it's natures intention (that's where you god squad bible bashers shout "fuck yeah" or words to that effect). Or is it because we are moulded by family, friends and our society?

Yep, for anyone with a IQ above that of a goldfish, will realise it's that old nature/nurture debate thing. (To condescending?) A debate that has raged and divided, and got so fucking boring that it's not even discussed anymore. For those who are out of the loop it kinda goes like this. In the beginning it was all 'It's nature' then educated people got involved and it was 'it's a combination of nature and nurture', then technology got involved and it became 'it's nurture'. More commonly known as social conditioning.

Therefore we are who we are because of other people, we are able to be influenced and influence others. Nothing new there then. We are also able to choose who we want to be, influence ourselves. That is of course if we have been socially conditioned to be self influencing. We also know that our environment influences who we are. Home, school, affluence etc.

So if our personalities can be influenced by others, our environment and ourselves, should we not be told? Let's take employment as an example. Our society deems it such that, to live we must work. Well it does for the vast majority of us. So getting a job is a critical aspect of that. However, we are not informed that the job we get will influence our personalities. Shouldn't that be part of the job description? Your responsibilities will be... Your salary will be... You will likely/be required to become....

Surely if we know that an environment and others influences personalities, that big data and super computers can produce pie charts and bar graphs of likely personalities that would be/are produced, wouldn't you as a parent consider that worthwhile information for your child's future? Wouldn't that information be useful when selecting a mate or lifelong partner?

What about all the people who already know this rather crucial bit of information? What have they done with it? Who's personalities have they influenced, are influencing? How has your personality been influenced? Is your current personality the one you would have chosen to have?

Christmas is just round the corner, Halloween some time before that. A time when a fuck load of children (children are not 'children', they are adults in development) will have their personalities influenced by sweets and gifts, among other things. Your children, who's personalities are more influenced by everything else other than you. Yet you as the parent get the blame if they fuck up, go astray or deviate from social expectations.

The irony being, you as a parent are socially conditioned to accept the social conditioning of your children, and are socially conditioned to accept responsibility for whatever someone else decides the outcome should be.

Would you want your child to be the person above? Or would you rather they were socially conditioned to know they can influence their own personality, and grow up to possess personalities of their own choosing?