I'm the girl, I'm unwanted

At the age of 14 I knew - on the news of my birth, Cumma sat in the veranda with her hands. I, the father of the mother is the second daughter.
Just one and a half year after this incident my brother was born.
I used to call him 'Lakshmichari' forever.
In my childhood I understood that there is a system for me and sister at home, and the other is different for brother.
Four shirts for Pujoy brothers; One of my cousins. Brother Tilfinbx's apple-banana-sweet Whatever my sister-in-law My mother did not have the power to leave these strict rules. Didi never tried to break the rules.
But I had to hear from him repeatedly, - "The girl's big noisy, a lot of greed, Where are you from Alkshmi?
Still, my breathing was not at all. Mother sometimes gave me money to cover my affair, everyone hid. Dudi has never asked for anything.
I was then in class six.
When I returned from the school, my mother's face was so tired.
Something can be predicted. Sister sitting in the evening said, "Why are you so worried about your mother?
Today, it's a trick, I do not want to hide my money. "
The three-and-a-half-year-old sister, from me, had told me that 'what do the girls do in this house.
The girls do not want to ask for something; Do not talk too much; Not jumping; Do not run The girls do not have to scream; The kite does not move; Do not play; Do not spread legs; You do not have to laugh, you do not have to eat all the time.

I was surprised to hear that ... "No".
I did not believe that there was so much for 'long'. I could not cope with the sickness of my sister. After two years of marriage, only twenty-two, died in his in-laws house.

That day my mother was lying on bed all day long. Grandma, brother and father have seen the awakening of humanity, for a day. Nobody has formulated a mother all day.
Frankly, on that day of sadness, I loved that day; My mother, thinking of one thing, got this opportunity, a full day's rest !!
A professor in the college, holding a close friend's hand in the empty classroom. I went to tell the Principal. He said: "Girls are always in college, do not cry at all." I see what action can be taken. " He did not even know what action he had taken today.
However, knowing my family in any way, I advised me to take special action. Standing in front of my father, he said to me in the right language: "Do not go to college and you need to go to college. Let me examine you at home." I am not a lakshmi like a sister, so arrangements made by others have not been possible.
My 'girlfriends', I remember one day.
There was a puja in the house. Sister is helping the mother in the kitchen. Dhamma gave me training in the form of prasad, pots, flower belapata by taking them to Thakurghar. Puja was finished, my education was complete. But, my eyes are still stuck, on the platter of the festive offering decorated for Narayan. The pinnacle of the offering is sitting on a peak, a large size is a sage of Nellangarh.
In the meantime Puja ended. Maa Prasad is doing the rounds of sharing. Suddenly! With all the surprises, I was surprised by the magnificent sandesh, clutches, and burnt the face.
I'm so unhappy with the face.
The sensation came back, when a slap of horror came out of the neck of the mother in Sandesh.

I understand from the great laugh of Thakuma - as much as the offering to me; Male members of the majority of those families
When I was sleeping with five finger spots on my mother's face. Sleep at the mother's touch on many nights. Swiman-rage turned to face. But, with my hands touching my hair, my mother's helpless tears, I could never forget.
"If you do not have a son's hand when you die, you do not have a bath." Brother was my father's investment in heaven.
My brother, currently working and married in a multi-national organization in Bangalore. With his non-Bengali family, he lives there safely. There is no need to come too much in this town. Even though the VEP of the office is in the guest house. Life in the southeast open large flat; At the wall of the house, they are in pain. Father died almost two years ago. Sixty percent of the provident fund cost the boy's careers. The entire investment in the water could not believe in the day of death.
Thakumara is running roughly. The old man did not get the water of his hands. My students are teaching and working at the school money, the world is standing in any way.
On that day, we have only stepped at the door of the house. Mom ran away ........
"Early earnings, I'm not eating anything since morning.
We entered the house and sat near the head of the old man.
It seems to me, a little smile.
The two glasses of milk in my hands, with the face of my face, again brought my head to bed in fatigue.
Called me to the gesture. I lowered my face to the mouth.
Quietly speaking, Laxmi said, "Lakshmicharan marriage Corise; You want to be your daughter.
Please forgive the elderly. "Girl With Mom travelling- Valobasa
Mother and I stayed awake all night that day.
Overnight, scratched water from the clutter.
After so many days my 'Alakshmi' birth was successful for the old man.