Fuck honey, I am glad lots of people have stepped in to offer good advice and support here. You are struggling amd my heart reaches out to you, which doesnt help when I am too far away to help.. if I could Id storm your doors down. It absolutely DOESNT help when people suggest blanket remedies that are not necessarily right for you. Have you been to any support groups or is there anyway you can reach out to people close by to connect with folk? Thinking about you xx
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Thanks for your support. <3 I had a therapist a couple of years, or a year and a half ago? But haven't had any kind of group or support of that kind since. I've been focusing since on trying to get my day to day in order - ie, my chaotic apartment - and have made slow but noticeable progress on that front, which does help because it's 1000x more overwhelming when I don't have the energy to cook or clean and my living space is just a sty. Once I have purged a bunch (which I have, purged a LOT of stuff), it will be easier to maintain. But you gotta make a mess to purge - like Mari Kondo has people just dump ALL of their clothes on the bed to sort through them, you know? That really is the way to do it, and what I started doing even before I had ever heard of Mari Kondo. Ergo, the chaos apartment. LOL But the end is near! I can see it!
Then we'll see what next step I can take to get my life to a more manageable level.
Ah, quite literally cleaning out the cobwebs!!! I know what you mean. They say a tidy house means a tidy mind.. but gotta eatch you dont get OCD about it! It is therapeutic though...reach out if you need.
I used to have OCD. Legitimately, diagnosed by a psychologist OCD, not internet hyperbole OCD. It made cleaning and purging harder! Because I had the perfectionist streak so bad, if I couldn't do it perfectly, I'd be utterly overwhelmed and not be able to do anything at all.
That's why I could "perfect" micro spaces - I could Tetris a closet, say, or keep my desk at work and the filing cabinet hyper organized. I once was hired for a temp job where it was literally "please make sense of our donations room" which was just piles of donated goods to the organization. I made it into a little store where clients of the org could shop. The marketing person wanted to hire me permanently just for that. LOL
But my apartment? Total disaster. Because it was too much.
So, I had to nix the OCD - which I have, thank the Gods - in order to even begin to tackle this. It's a very, very good thing that I can purge. ^_^