I have suffered the way you are suffering, a number of times. Those I made the most sacrifices for have been the first to turn away when I lost my wealth. However, I did learn a few important lessons.
You are feeding your own feelings of not being worthy. For instance, you mention offering to help a game developing company for free and you are upset they did not bother to reply.
If you have a number of games you created that achieved a degree of success, you would be right to be upset. So, instead of allowing yourself to feed off their negativity, ask some questions:
Could it be that there are legal reasons why they cannot work with you, as they might leave themselves open to claims by you, if you do substantially contribute to their game?
Are they inundated with people offering (especially the younger adults) who are convinced that once they help, the company will see how valuable they are and rush to offer them a wonderful job and shares? Such people are usually unstable and live in fantasies, which when they do not come true quickly, make them furious and insulting. A few such unpleasant experiences may have taught them to ignore such requests to be of assistance.
Asking for nothing was guaranteed to achieve the snub you were dealt. Why? Well, if you do not value your abilities and time, why should they? Surely you do not expect business people to believe in altruism? That you do not mind them making huge profits and being showered by admiration by the gaming community, while you sit hidden away, gleefully rejoicing on their behalf?
.
Now that that part of my answer is out of the way, may I congratulate you? I have gone through periods of depression and spent countless hours writing poems (I was lucky, someone stole the case I held them in - I hope the miserable sod found himself trapped into reading all my self-pity poems).
The way you wrote about your feelings is far more talented than mine were. So, there you go; at your worst moment, you exhibited a positive ability.
Smile, put on clean clothes and go out for a coffee. Look at the people enjoying life and tell yourself, "I have just as much to enjoy about life, if I let myself."
Thank you for your elaborate comment @arthur.grafo.
You are right. I do feed into my own sense of worthlessness. Its a succumbing of sorts.
Perhaps upon a childish level I just want to be loved or respected - but my behavior right now is worthy of neither. My 'offers' are tainted by my desperation and so the downward spiral accelerates.
I appreciate that you take the time to open my eyes to why no self-respecting studio would touch somebody such as myself. It makes sense.
I also appreciate your kind words. Take care.
Why not contact coders who want to create a game - maybe they need an idea, or maybe you can evolve an idea with them. Play it cool and demand they and you sign a contract and spell out from the start what shares you will each have in the future company.
A good place is to look for young programmers in countries that do not have a strong presence in the gaming market - which means the coders in those countries have no one else to work with.
(A few countries: Cyprus; South Africa; how about Malta? Maybe countries like Rumania, Hungary etc?)
Stay away from India, China and all the Arab countries. Their style of doing business is too different.
If you find one or more and you get something going, just think, because you did it, you also helped new young talent find a road to achieving their own dreams.
Isn't it worth fighting for?
btw - my brother got involved in a company (took it over) creating characters that can respond instantly. It was used for creating a tv program. A female character would respond to questions and love and sex, giving advice. It was popular and the season was extended, but then an investor ended up costing us so much money we had to shut it down.
We even talked to the widow of Elvis, offering to create an Elvis on stage who can stand next to her and talk and sing - even new songs. Another idea, was to create something like the wax musuem, but with virtual personalities. For instance, have Hitler and people can ask him questions and he'll answer, but a full study of him would have to be made for him to become as real as possible.
A pity the idea had to die because of some crook, but that is life.