RE: The Spirit of the Gift: A Vision for a Gift Economy! With an Opportunity for a Gift from Me :)
Thank you so much for the gift and for your thoughts!
I think you bring up a great point. One that I believe often idealizes gift economies to the point of non-existence. I hear often that 'gifts' come with no expectation and are best when anonymous.
I believe gift economies only work if there is complete trust and understanding that any gifts you give will be met with return gifts. This understanding could be material (in the form of me offering a return gift) or spiritual (with an understanding that the universe never leaves a gift unnoticed).
Then how is it a gift? Well, first the quantity/value is determined by the giver, not the receiver. In a complex gift society gifts would circulate (pay it forward) and since these societies were small enough they always knew it would be paid forward back. If I had a big enough community on Steemit, my approach would have been to simply encourage people to pay-it-forward or to gift each other in the comments. Since this is not the case I wanted to create that tangle of obligation (relationship) by offering a return gift (unspecified) so I could decide what I would like to give per-person :)
How interested would you be in giving a friend a gift for his birthday each year if he had never given you a gift on yours?
Yes, it's a gift. Yes, our society says it comes with no obligation. But, that is not the point. Obligations connect us. They create relationships. The problem with our money system is the lack of obligation as every transaction becomes equal on the spot. So, this limits the connections and relationships made possible within gift economies.
I hope this gives a bit more insight into my philosophy and reasoning :)
Thank you again for the gift!
Thank you @rieki for such a beautiful explanation!
But since I don't share the same philosophy, I couldn't relate to it so far. I really hate the burden of obligations which I'm loaded on in the name of gift. I love to give and receive gifts with no-obligations attached. Otherwise, it's almost a business or a zero-sum trade.
Honestly speaking, I have never felt comfortable visiting places which operates solely on the basis of gift economy esp. the ones which don't even mention the recommended price. As you said, the giver determines the quantity / value of the gift being given. But as a receiver, I don't have any idea of that value or pehaps it's not as much valuable to me as it was to the giver. So I won't be obliged in the equal proportion. So when I make a return gift according to my valuation of that gift (i.e. I undervalue it) and which in turn is again evaluated and assigned a further lower value by its receiver; imagine how much dissatisfaction and sourness it can bring to the mutual relationship.
Same applies when the gift is over-valued. And in most cases, if not all, gifts are either under-valued or over-valued. Now to your question:
I dunno how you label gifts. But I'd always be interested to gift a friend with respect to the bonding I've with him or her. For me, friendship itself is a gift. It doesn't matter when my friend gifts me. And I don't expect it to be on my b'day only. A relationship itself is a gift which is difficult to quantify. It keep exchanging several intangible gifts continuously. I don't look for a specific timing to deliver a gift. My experience so far has been that intangible exchanges creates a stronger bonding than tangible exchanges.
No offense to you but I actually hate this concept of:
I'd never love to receive such a gift. But I respect your philosophy and an intention to create a strong relationship. I've been fortunate enough to receive so many gifts from so many known and unknown people that I don't think I can ever pay them back or to anybody else.
For me gift is like an absolute love beaming towards everyone without an expectation that you would be loved similarly in return. When you love in expectation to be loved in return, sooner or later you would meet some level of frustration. That's how I see things. Just wrote to let you know my understanding of the system. No doubt, I may be wrong. Whatever works for you is good for you. Keep spreading smiles!
"Thank you @rieki for such a beautiful explanation!"
And thank you :)
As it turns out, I actually completely agree with everything you said! The fault in on me for not distinguishing the difference between 'the spirit of the gift' and 'gift economy'.
What you describe is my feelings towards the spirit of gift giving and chose to operate as such.
This is why I don't actually advocate for a full gift economy and advocate for gifts to coincide with a new monetary system which I addressed with Our NeighbouGood Coin!
Wholeheartedly agree!
What you speak of is the contradiction between an effective gift economy and the spirit of the gift. Which is why I believe there are no successful gift economies operating today. Also, which is why I don't advocate for large (or even medium) sized gift economies...
Thank you for your beautiful thoughts, and thank you for helping clarify my thoughts on the matter too and help to create a better distinction between the spirit of the gift and a gift economy. :)