A True Test of Fortitude

For the most part I am an eternal optimist, but there are moments when I slump into some of the less feel good parts of my experience. Yesterday was one of those days and yet today my mind was blown as FB re-posted a share I made a year ago, which I am inserting below. It was as if the Yoda Dawn showed up today to share the perfect wisdom from exactly a year ago.

[Begin last year's blog post. Same title as above]

In these days of unbelievable insanity with a surreal cast of characters, I check my ticket stub and wonder how I ended up in the wrong theater. Yet, I know this is exactly what I came for. It is a time of aligning definitively with the light within us, or what Yoda and Obi Wan spoke of as “the force” and committing ourselves in service to that even when the pull to slip into anger, aggression, blame and hate is strong and familiar.

I don’t remember which of the Star Wars episodes it was when Luke lost his hand in the battle with Darth Vader, but I distinctly remember Obi Wan’s words to Luke, “If you give in to hate, you are defeated.”

I also think about a recent teaching I heard from Matt Kahn who spoke of a transforming dream in which he was an onlooker as Christ asked a follower if he was ready to be initiated and the soul said, yes. Then they were in a hell realm with ghoulish hands lurching toward the feet of Christ and the initiate as they passed through the darkness toward a pin prick of light in the distance. Christ was holding the initiates hand and the hands drew back in his presence. Christ said to the initiate, If you know and trust the light that walks beside you, the darkness will part. Then the initiate’s attention got pulled into the writhing suffering of the souls in the darkness and he let go of Christ’s hand. Christ continued to move forward and disappeared into the darkness. The initiate was overcome with the weight of the suffering and the clutching hands grew nearer. Just when he felt he could resist the darkness no longer, Christ reappeared. The initiate asked him, Why did you leave me? Christ replied, You let go of my hand. I simply kept moving forward. He also said that all of the souls lost in the darkness had the same ability to choose to continue on to the light.

The recounting of this dream by Matt resonated strongly with me because of my deep love for Christ and the truth of the words, If you know and trust the light that walks beside you, the darkness will part.

It’s difficult to express how these words swirl through a confused human body of cellular memories of how he suffered and died and a sense that I have failed him again when my matching of energy with what is unawakened causes me to let go of his hand.

I know all the right words to say to profess my unwavering commitment to the light, but sometimes I feel weak and that’s when I rely on loving the one who feels weak and blessing the evolving heart of humanity as we take turns coming back for each other. [End last year's blog post].

This photo credit goes to @zipporah post titled Feathered Beauty at the end of January. What fun it is to add beauty to my posts while directing people to the talents of others!!!