Help children normalize

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The abnormal mentioned here, there is no derogatory meaning, we must not apply to discrimination, normal and abnormal are the difference between idealization and not ideal.

Montessori mentioned the word conversion because many children have been far away from normal, but a good educational environment can bring them back to normal state.

If adults treat children in many wrong ways, they will lead to the following abnormal behaviors.

The first abnormal state is called "Shenyou".

Shenyou is that children are not as focused as other children. He does nothing, he doesn't focus, and he will see other places in class.

The concentration of children is particularly important. One child is reflected by the teacher that he never listens to the class seriously and his grades are muddled. We asked what happened. When we knew it, we found out that her parents quarreled. When a family is full of violence, many disputes make the child feel afraid, and his attention can not be focused.

Another reason why Shenyou is very important is that most people believe that children's childhood is closely connected with toys. In fact, there is no need to let children have too many toys.

The second abnormal state is the obstacle.

The end result of a family that overeducates children too early is that their children's grades are getting worse and worse. Because you have created a learning barrier to him, you don't let him explore the world at his pace, but you instill him too much, which causes him to have a rebellious or arrogant mind, so that he doesn't feel that this thing has anything to learn.

Some children learn mathematics when they are young. When he is in grade one, they find that they can all do so, and they begin to disdain to learn them. The final result is that they are bored to hear mathematics and get worse and worse. When the obstacles arise, it becomes very difficult to turn around the child and make him rebuild his fun in exploration and learning.

The third abnormal state is attachment.

Some children always stick to their parents, he gives up his activities, just want to be with his parents forever. In fact, a child likes to play with himself, and he will have a good time.

If a child gives up his activities, he depends on adults in everything. He will be lazy when he grows up and doesn't feel responsible. He thinks that all of this should be related to his parents.

The fourth abnormal state is possessiveness.

If a person has something that is not needed by himself, his development is out of balance.

The fifth abnormal state is the desire for power.

Power desire is that children order adults to buy this, buy that, and get more through adults.

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Many parents especially like to meet the needs of their children, even without the bottom line. Finally, the child found it easy for the commander to do something more easily than he did, and he gave up his efforts and exploration.

Be careful that you should let the child learn to solve some problems by himself, not let him achieve everything through adults.

The sixth abnormal state is inferiority.

Inferiority comes from exactitude. When the guests come to the house, the guests break a cup and you will say, "it doesn't matter, it doesn't matter, it's not expensive. It was bought by me when I last visited..." You want to let the guests not feel guilty, but the child breaks a cup, you will say: "what a good cup has been broken, how can you be so careless?"

When a child observes that you are not the same as others, the child's inferiority gradually develops.

Our requirements for children are higher than ordinary people, even our requirements for children are higher than those of ourselves! Such children tend to have inferiority when they grow up. He would not have enough confidence and would feel that he had no power to do all kinds of things, because he grew up in constant criticism.

Many parents are difficult to respect their children, including the conflict between children and parents, which mainly comes from the parent's dominant instinct and working instinct.

The dominant instinct is that the child wants to have his voice and wants to lead his life. But parents always regard the child as his product and private property. When parents communicate with their children and control them in such an attitude, there is a dispute on the control of both sides, which leads to many parents not to let their children grow up in accordance with their own rhythm.

Children's working instinct is to know the world through work. For example, he buckle, endorse his own bag to school, go to wash dishes, help his mother arrange the table, and so on. These things are children in the process of exploring and learning and perfecting themselves.

The child will be especially happy to help adults do something.

When children are active, they will feel happy and fun in the process of participating in the work. Adults are too tired to work as a hard job to support their families, and they will not guide children correctly. We say "you hurry up" and "I help you" to our children, which makes it impossible for children to know the world through work.

If we can really recognize our work again, we will appreciate that work itself is a process of constantly improving our personality, constant cultivation and continuous refinement, and will more respect the nature of children.

After understanding the dominant instinct and working instinct, we should respect the rules of children's learning, so that he can do something repeatedly, so that he can participate in many family work and explore the world. Keep enough respect for him, treat him as an adult and talk to him. At this time, you find that children can grow up very sunny, healthy and cheerful.

Each of us has the future of mankind in our hands. I hope we cherish our own power and let our children grow up to their original appearance.