The Scratching post.
Dear Katie the Cat,
I am replying to the recent complaint you issued reguarding the lack of milk saucers in your owners home. @vaughnzipper
I am afraid this is of no concern of mine as I am a cat owner myself and don't spoil my feline friend with dairy poison.
Now put your tongue away please and leave me to my human-ing.
Sincerely
Your not so friendly, friend.
Barbara C.