Atleast I Tried | Never Give Up

THE TRAVEL

For three(3) days, I wake up at 5:00 am. I take a bath, eat and prepare my stuffs. I will be all ready at 6:30 then I will go to the bus stop or wait for the private cars that offer a ride, and that will cost Php 60.00.

FIRST DAY

I took a bus going to the city. And it's already 7 am that's why I didn't have the chance to be seated. I'm standing for almost an hour. I was almost standing beside the driver's seat. Haha!

WHERE TO GO

I'm going to [SPARKPLACE CUBAO].

Source

I'll be on training for 3 days for the position of JUNIOR CREDIT ADVISOR in HOME CREDIT PH. The first day went good. I met new friends which I loved most because we are all member of LGBT. Mostly are bisexuals and a lesbian. In just 3 days, we enjoyed each other's company. We had fun, laughed a lot, and tease each other like we know each of us for a long time.

Alecx,Justine,Me,Marxie,Kc and Pamela

On our 2nd day, we practiced again for the mock calls. I'm always seated at the back because I love it there |introvert problem| . So far, so good. We start from 9am to 6pm. I participate as needed ofcourse. Everything's fine till the last day, but.....

LAST DAY

I woke up early. No traffic. I'm ready. I'm prepared until I got nervous. I am the only one going up to the 7th floor. I hate elevators especially when it carries lots of people. It feels like I'm choking.

I wonder that time if it's a bad or good sign.

EXAM AND MOCK CALL

I didn't get pressured on the exam. I answered the questions really well and end up I'm one of the highest scorer (27/30 items). I said, wow! I think this is it! But inside of me, will I pass the mock call? I know I can. I believe. I'm confident.

Then it's time. We've been grouped for 3 Teams. I'm from group A and 7th trainee to do the mock call. It's not hard. We follow the call flow. It could be english, filipino or taglish. But I didn't make it. Why???

First, when I am already on the field I saw the employees, it's very crowded and noisy which I really don't like. And ofcourse, I am aware about that and I thought I will be okay. I hate being an introvert!!!!!! >_<

MY TURN

At first, I'm doing fine. Until the QA's background became so noisy, as part of the test. But I couldn't take it. I lost my lines but not pressured. It feels like my head is going to pop because of the noise. And I said to myself, No, this is not for me. This is not the work for me. So then, I quit. I told the QA on the other line that, I'm sorry sir, Ayoko na, pass. Then I hung up the phone, went back to the training room and called the next trainee after me.

My new friends ask me, What happened? I told them the truth, and they didn't like what I did. I just tell them, don't worry I'm fine, but they still expect that I'll pass the training. And the time came. Our trainor finally came up the room and told us who passed. And surprisingly, my name got called first. I reacted. Because I know within my self that I don't deserve it. They say, maybe ou trainor wanted to give me a chance but I reacted, so he revoked his decision. And it's okay with me. But my friends are really sorry, and keep calling me CRAZY on what I did. And out of 21 trainees, only 9 passed.

That's life. Atleast I tried. I tried to fight my fears. I tried to be as extrovert as other people. But I really can't. I know that I let the opportunity to pass, but what if I really push through, and I am not happy, surely in the middle of the process, I'll quit. So, it's much better that I quit on that day. I can say, I'm not a quitter, I just love my self and value my time and other people's time.

QUOTES

It doesn't matter if it's a job, relationship or a lifestyle. If it doesn't make you happy, LET IT GO. - Unknown

Choose a job you love and you will never have a to work a day in your life. - Confucius

Through a long and painful process, I've learned that happiness is an inside job - not based on anything or anyone in the outer material world. I've become a different and better person - not perfect, but still a work in progress. Alana Stewart

I WILL MISS THESE PEOPLE

If you wanna know my post about being an introvert, here's the link:

https://steemit.com/blog/@rruubbiie/i-m-an-introvert