Filipino Jokes Translated for Western Tastes Part 86

in #busy5 years ago

Giphy

Good day, my fellow Steemers and Whalesharers! This is the 86th part of my series post about local Filipino jokes which I have translated for people of the English language. Please read and pick the ones you like best from this post series. Tell me in the comments section on why you liked it.

I think nobody in Steemit and Whaleshares has done this kind of post series before. So I took it upon myself to do it even if you think it might not be popular or profitable. I just wanted to be the first to do this kind of thing. It would be up to you to decide, my fellow readers, if I was successful or not.

There are still a lot more Filipino local jokes that we need to be translating. These jokes are the products of the Filipinos' creativity, ingenuity, and love of social drinking.

Read and enjoy!



The tattoo

BRUNO: Dad, I got a tattoo! I'm sick of the guys at school always thinking that I'm gay!
DAD: That's great! Where did you place it?
BRUNO: On my eyebrows! Don't I look chic and beautiful?!?


To the movies

BOYFRIEND: Let's go to the movies!
GIRLFRIEND: Okay, are you planning to kiss me there?
BOYFRIEND: What? No!
GIRLFRIEND: Fondle my boobs?
BOYFRIEND: Never!
GIRLFRIEND: Grope me between my legs?
BOYFRIEND: Heaven forbid! I'm a gentleman!
GIRLFRIEND: Fine! You go the movies yourself!


The hanging clothes

Giphy

SUSPICIOUS PARISHIONER: Father, why are there even women's undergarments hanging in your backyard clothesline? Do you have a wife or girlfriend?
PRIEST: My good woman, I can't even live these days on people's donations! Therefore, I accept even laundry!


The "sagging" reason

A teen daughter and her mom in bikinis were enjoying time at the beach.

TEEN DAUGHTER: Mom, your boobs are big but sagging!
MOM: That's what happens, dear, when you have gone through breastfeeding five kids!
TEEN DAUGHTER: But there are only four of us as your children!
MOM: The fifth "kid" I mean is your father!


The lawyer

Giphy

JOHN: I have a brother who's a lawyer. He claims that he's good at winning cases. That he guarantees that if he ever loses a case, then he's willing to go to jail.
PETER: That's great! I'd like to hire him now to help me with an inheritance dispute with my cousins!
JOHN: I'm afraid he's resting and still not available.
PETER: Why?
JOHN: He just got out of jail!



Translated from Source: greenpinoy.blogspot.com


Follow me as @darthnava: "Did you just laugh? No, I was checking if your sense of humor still works."

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