Journeyman's Books of the Decade
Another ten years of novels, another ten years of exploring the depths of other people's minds. Here's a list of the books which tickled Journeyman's imagination more than any others in the 2010s. Pingchowah!
1Q84 - Haruki Murakami
A Japanese assassin looks up to the sky and notices that there are two moons up there. Rather than accepting the fact that she’s going crazy, she decides that she has crossed over into another world for the explicit purpose of taking down a religious cult that worships clone-making fairies that spawn from the mouths of dead goats.
If you thought that I was talking about Orwell’s 1984 then you have earned yourself, yet another, smack-across-face-with-a-hardcover-copy-of-Pride-&-Prejudice. They will be handed out by trained, beefy librarians in bookstores worldwide by the end of the year.
Red Rising – Pierce Brown
Interplanetary warfare with a big helping of class warfare. The blue-eyed blonds are at the top of this food chain, of course, but I’ll commend Brown for keeping the blacks relatively high on the racial ladder and leaving the gingers at the bottom. The lead character is one of these gingers who decides to dip his toes into the world of solar warfare after getting an extreme makeover.
He’s motivated by the fact that his fiancé was executed for singing a song. I’ll do a lot for the love of my life, but toppling a 1000-year-old regime run by 10-foot-tall aristocrats who send their kids to murder-school seems a bit extreme.
Fates & Furies – Lauren Groff
Thank you Groff for showing the world what love is really like. It’s hard, it’s painful and it makes you question your will to live but when it comes down to it, love is what holds you down. Anti-romance at its best, told from the perspective of each lover.
The Century Trilogy - Ken Follett
Anyone with a television knows the basics of what went down in the 1900s. WWI, WWII, the atom bomb, white presidents with black mistresses, having to choose between university education and going abroad to kill random people, shotgun weddings after impregnating the boss’ daughter, and learning to survive on nothing but potatoes and vodka. A lot can happen in 100 years.
Ken Follett knows way too much about what happened in the past. Is he a diligent researcher, or the immortal author?
The Book of Pook - Pook
The best books come at the best times. This book came into my life when I was feeling a scarcity of love and Pook reminded me about the abundance all around us. Getting girls is easy, especially when they’re not the focus.
Racking up notches is fun, until you stop enjoying the process.
The Secret Lives of Baba Segi’s Wives - Lola Shenoyin
This guy had 11 kids from 3 different wives and it wasn’t until his fourth wife failed to quicken when the learned how none of the kids were actually his.
Fire & Blood – George R. R. Martin
Enough incest and dragon fire to satisfy your dark urges. The contents of this book are taken from the first-hand accounts of a wiseman and a fool. The fool’s version is colorful, but the wiseman’s stinks of ass-kissing. I’d probably do the same if the people I’m talking about keep fire-breathing geckos for pets.
50 Shades (of whatever) - E.L. James
I still haven’t read it, but anything that can simultaneously turn on this many women all over the world deserves an honorable mention.
The Grand Tour - Ben Bova
I want a spaceship. Atmo-rated and nuclear-powered because having a nuclear reactor inside is the only way to make sure that it won’t be shot down. The first place I’m going is Jupiter to find out what it’s like in that massive ocean. Yes, my spaceship will somehow be able to withstand the crushing pressure. Don’t ask me how; it’s space-magic.
The next stop is the planet of the space-babes. Gotta spread that seed ;)
Pranic Nourishment - Jasmuheen
How much faith do you have in the internet? If you heard about a certain group of people who do not require any food or water at all, and their bodies function even better as a result, would you believe them? Well, they don’t care whether you believe them or not.
They claim to live on love, light, sunshine and air. Fuck it, if a plant can convert sunshine into energy, then so can I.
NB- This is not a guide on what books to read. Journeyman will not be responsible for any consciosness-expanding side-effects that may result from heavy reading.
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