Judging, Judge-mental, or willfully manipulating?.... The @tarazkp files #1

Comparison is the thief of joy, and being judge-mental is only possible by comparing yourself to others...

Starting to be happy, begins with not being so judge-mental .

The gap between 'judging something' and being judge-mental is huge.

It's also as close together as the thinness of a piece of paper.

The Difference between judging and a having a Judge-mental Personality.

Judgement isn’t wrong, it's essential in fact.

It's something that we all do everyday, on a pretty continual basis.
'can I cross the road before the approaching truck squashes me?', for example, requires a _judgment _.

Judging things is a necessity in life.

Judging things based on facts you, is sound judgment, but this is where the lines can blur dangerously...

When facts are not the only thing used to judge situations, and opinions that are not based in reality, are also used, then, quite aptly the judge-mental personality starts to raise it's very ugly head.

Not using the right tools to judge anything, will produce a judge-mental personality.
And the thing is, it becomes a habit - and like any habits they can be very hard to break - especially if you are not conscious of it.

Know thyself.

Example:

You see a girl late at night, dressed in skimpy clothing, and hanging around on a street corner, it’s easy to make the judgement that they are hooking.
What if that person is waiting for a taxi after a night out?
Your judgement of the girl, therefor, would be inaccurate.

Opinion and preconceived ideas that we have,(seeing girls in skimpy clothing means they are hooking, for example), have now superseded any actual facts. You become blind to reality.
A girl standing on a street corner can have many different reasons for being there, other than hooking.

Would you feel guilty for your poor judgment, if you later found out that she was raped while waiting for a taxi ?
Or would you justify your incorrect assessment, with words of 'she was asking for it' (followed by a list of totally subjective reasons to support yet another incorrect reality).

This shows the contrast (and insecurity) between between making a judgement (there is girl stood on the street corner) and being a judge-mental (there is a girl stood on the street corner who is a hooking), and it's based entirely on how we choose to interpret the circumstances that are presented.

It's a very dangerous road to go down, when opinion and personal bias, is presented as fact to support a narrative in some way.
When you frame something based around falsehoods, making it sound real, you then go forwards with an ever increasingly, distorted view of reality.
Madness.

I use the word judge-mental very intentionally.

@tarazkp expresses this trait continuously through lots of his posts.

Here's one example (of too many to count). But I'll be bringing them up now regularly, to continue paint a whole picture.

Being judge-mental is not intelligent observation, it's creating a false narrative to support a position.
(to me, that is cancerous, for it mutates reality).

To not call these manipulations out, is to accept a false reality.
So I will be doing.
All the time.

Hopefully it will not only highlight to the readers of his posts, the ether like substance to the words, but will also help tazza in understanding himself better.

Again, I have my doubts that anything he does is an unconscious act, he's too smart for that - In which case, that would make him disingenuous, and it needs calling out anyway!

To apply our own interpretation of any given narrative (rather than apply the ones based in reality), is being judge-mental.

Choosing to allow a judge-mental person to control our opinion, through false narratives, for some a self-serving goal, is the road to hell.

And it's the willful manipulation of others...

Of course, an integral par to of judge-mental, is projection.

Here's the first (of many to come), to illustrate this better.

Excerpt from:
https://steemit.com/thoughts/@tarazkp/holding-values-without-earning

Let the cherry picking begin....

word salad, word salad.....

.......then it get interesting...

A scarcity mindset in a land of abundance.

No different to the megacorps who have no limit in the number of lines they will erase to get an extra dollar, to gain a sliver more advantage or a little more power over others to make themselves feel better about their own lack of what they desire.

a little more power over others to make themselves feel better about their own lack of what they desire....

A blatantly nonsensical assumption...and based on nothing other than personal opinion.
( a projection of ones own desire? I would posit that there's a distinct possibility of such).

_ ....make themselves feel better about their own lack of what they desire.... Like a man that goes to a prostitute and pays for control....._

What's really interesting here , is the insertion of a sexual scenario , straight from the 'corporate power' one.
Power and sex are linked, without a doubt, but not in the way many naive people think.

The jump from the critical perspective of 'the power of corporations'- straight into the sexual scenario is quite a leap -...but not if the two are not already closely aligned in the mind of the writer.
I didn't make the jump, @tarazkp did.

Then the judge-mental, (and projection), get into top gear.
(The hill of morals and ethics, is fertile ground for such judge-mental people).

Like a man that goes to a prostitute and pays for control so as to "feel like a man" and then justifies it with some lame excuse to veil their neediness, insecurities and inability. Pathetic.

Is this based on personal experience, hearsay, or research?
There is no evidence to support this hypothesis, but it talks of a deeper personal experience.
Experience?
Projection?

From my own experience in the adult industry and escorting, and talking to -literally - thousand of males who pay for sexual services, I would say with some confidence that this scenario of "pays for control so as to "feel like a man"... is in the VAST minority .

As in less than 10%.

...experience, projection, or research? Or is it just ether based on fantasy, nothing but personal feelings?_

It is not based in any reality that I'm aware of.
(rape is not 'paying for control',- it's rape).
Maybe @tarazkp could elucidate, for the sake of clarity, where he gets this reality from?
... it's framed as a male seeking power....

and then justifies it with some lame excuse to veil their neediness, insecurities and inability. Pathetic.

Judge-mental and projection into full effect.

This says far more about @tarazkp, and his judge-mental state, than anything else.
...are these feelings from personal experience with a sex worker?
If not how could you posit this as some fact?
....are they are just emotive words to paint a false narrative, to lead the reader by the emotional nose.

That is called manipulation.

How would you know that these are the reasons and underlying reasons, of a man who pays for sex?
(Without personal experiencing it).
Projection, much?
Who is does he see as pathetic?
Guilt complexes? Masochism?
I dunno.

Projection?

Do you see?

There is value in words, there is value in the discussion, even f the only discussion held is in the head. Someone can trawl through these words here and cherry pick lines to attack, another can do the same and find words that they will think about and create a gem from. Most will stay the same, some will change forever.

....and cherry pick lines to attack

Interesting... the preemptive defensive portion...Setting himself up as the 'defender of attack', rather than a participant in a discussion of his making....

THERE IS INDEED VALUE IN THESE WORDS, JUST NOT THE ONES THAT YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE TYPING ABOUT.
YOU CREATED GEMS, THAT'S FOR SURE.

Know thyself, matey.

(I love competition, but don't bring a twig to sword fight....That's just masochism...of which I could also give you some insights into)

TOTALLY MY OPINION BASED ON OBSERVATION....

With the judge-mental, come less happiness, with no sense of joy and laughter, and also no sense of humor..

Is this the best barometer for mental health?
A sense of humor?
I'm starting to think so....