Random Thoughts

I thought I’m in the stage of where I can do the things that I wanted for my life, where I can say that I’m already settled or satisfied with it, but it was just all about what I wanted that didn’t turn out from what I’ve expected.

Now I feel that I’m useless, I’ve got nothing to do or even to think for the future I just can’t, unlike before that I can even plan what to do next.

This really makes me down just like the batteries that gets empty, I’m empty. I don’t know what to do anymore, I cried and talked to myself just like I’m some kind of crazy.

Things maybe missed but all I am thinking is what will be tomorrow when I wake up?? Would I have a song that relates to me? Or news that I’ve been waiting for? What would I do if I hear those things, I really never think about this over it really makes me question everything I’ve done.

I don’t know of what will happen to me if I’ll disappoint myself again, I always think positive but also want to think if this positive goes wrong what I will do then.

Life is not easy, that’s what I have realized after I graduated from college. This is not what I’ve expected of myself.

I told myself that I want to grow fast and explore the future that’s waiting for me out there, but now all I want is to go back where I’m wild, young and doing stupid things that’s when I can say I’m being myself.

They said I changed a lot after I graduated high school, will that is true I became more responsible I always think about others and planned to help after I achieved my goals.

But now I’m starting all over again, I’m standing up again from that negative life I had. I’ll achieve all that I’ve planned and will help my family.