RE: Subject: Quarantine Measures + Company Picnic?
To: Renee Nouveau
From: Mr Ruben Adioactivities
Subject: RE: RE: fuckin' kvlt
Sorry sorry sorry. It seems that Mrs. Robinson and I mistakingly swapped medication bottles with each other at the watercooler. If there was a watercooler closer to my cubical this wouldn't have happened. I'm going to HR and taking a mental health day tomorrow.
My therapist had advised me that I should not be around zombies, as that is one of my triggers. If you could look into installing a panic room after this incident, that would be great. Safe-spaces don't seem sufficient around here
P.S. Next concert is next Tuesday lunch.
I also have a complaint, I over heard some other employees mention I am the most emotionally needy Blockcorp employee. This is insensitive. Unfortunately the zombie kudzus have gotten to them so I cant get my apology
To: Mr Ruben Adioactivities
From: Renee Nouveau
Subject: RE: RE: RE:fuckin' kvlt
Ruben,
There is a panic room. You have to panic harder for it to activate. Like really really hard.
Who spoiled the surprise that you've been voted Most Emotionally Needy Employee of the Month!? I made you a plaque and everything.
See you Tuesday!
Renee Nouveau
Public Relations for the
Secret Society Division