Addiction

Hello my name is Macie and I'm an addict.

Now I know what you are thinking, your mind running towards drug addiction, and no that's not what I mean when I say I constantly crave the rush.

I have an addiction towards heartbreak and pillow talk.
I met people and seek out the worst parts of them so I can feel something inside even if all I sense is an emptiness void.

I want the numb that feels my veins when the people I love rip apart my self worth and leave me alone to put myself together piece by piece. A broken version of who I used to be.

It's not a needle I want touching my skin, but the fingers and hands of man who may not leave bruises on my body but scars on my soul.

When he whispers in my ear I hear the words he yelled when he was angry. Lips touching mine but all I feel is the anger when I knew they had been on another's.

Yet, here I am, waiting anxiously for another dose to put me on cloud nine.