BEASTLY TALES - THE HOROLOGIST
Welcome to Beastly Tales. Each has a message, a moral. All are meant to have an element of humour. Naturally, any names included do not depict real folk but are included as part of the joke.
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(As with Beastly Banter Beastly Tales is written and illustrated by Richard Hersel.)
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Richard Hersel
BEASTLY TALES
THE HOROLOGIST
Oswald Cluck was an Horologist.
He wore an expensive watch on his wrist.
The disposition of planets he’d study.
He looked like a clockmaker, cheeks very ruddy.
His speciality was the cuckoo clock,
Fitted with loud and aggressive cuckoos to shock,
Customers as they walked into his shop,
Some begged him to make them stop.
“A cuckoo clock made by Cluck, is very sought after,”
“Cluck clocks can give you laughter,”
“If my cuckoos are overly loud,”
“It is only because they are so proud.”
A customer once told him, “you silly ass,”
“You would invent a noisy hour glass.”
So Cluck thought now, his time was up,
He was unused to being told to shutup.
But he was back to normal in no time at all,
Awaiting his usual early morning wake up call.
“Now I’ll invent a clock to cause me alarm,”
“A clock with a strident ringing charm.”
“I’ll cleverly name it ‘The Alarm Clock’ without qualm,”
“A gift to humanity that will cause no harm.”
Yes Cluck was at the peak of his inventing prime
And he had no time for those who would waste his time.
A customer enquired if he was open,
“I’ve been hurrying here, all the way hopin’.”
Said Cluck, “The hour is nigh,”
And he went inside, not saying goodbye.
“Bad manners are a sign of the Times,”
So said the customer, hearing the chimes,
Of a Grandfather clock right by the door,
“What I need are batteries,” He did implore,
“For my wrist watch which is losing time,”
“And nowadays, being late, seems such a crime.”
“If you’re late, buy a Carriage Clock”
“It’ll keep time, steady as a rock,”
“Yes, if punctuality is your passion,”
“It’ll ensure disciplined arrival in timely fashion.”
Cluck was asked for a digital clock.
He responded testily, “Are you trying to mock,”
“Me, with such an electronic notion,”
“I only do clocks with spring motion,”
“Real time pieces have springs and crystals you see.”
“No electronic time piece ever for me.”
And so with this thought sublime,
He was sure it would stand the test of time.
So back to cuckoo clocks lined on the wall,
Black Forest Cuckoo Clocks, the best of all.
They are made from wood brought in from the snow
Blocks of Lindenwood are the go.
Cluck had learned from his father for 35 years.
35 years of apprenticeship not so sunny,
Like a marriage, not too funny.
Cluck Clocks are the best in the world,
Except for one, still to be unfurled.
This is the ATOMIC CLOCK, most accurate of all,
Accurate to the second, for 300 million years
If you stick around to check it you will be in tears.
I love cuckoo clocks, I had one when I was a kid that lasted 30 years until my little son destroyed it! About the atomic clock I'm not sure but I think it's a trick;) hello Richard to tomorrow.
I'm not sure about the atomic clock either.
i don't know much English but i still find all the line in this writing interesting!.....big ups to Oswald Cluck, he was a winner!
Very creative. I can dig it
Wonderful Monday morning muse!
I didn't even know what a Horologist was, so I just learned something. The cuckoo clock has a charm that no electronic time piece could even compare too. Atomic clock😂
Cluck had learned from his father for 35 years.
35 years of apprenticeship not so sunny,
How time flies, time and season has passed
What a good post you got here @beastlybanter.
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I want one of those clocks.
my foto
