We are forced to give away pets and I suffer very much from this

When I was 7 years old, my mother and I brought a kitten into the house. Ordinary, black and white. He grew up to be a real handsome man, a kindly kotyar - big, fluffy, all right. Now he is already 15 years old. Apparently, from the obvious old age, he periodically allows himself all sorts of liberties, for example, his tray with corners is confused periodically. But this is nonsense, in fact. In my 16 years, on the family council it was decided to start a dog. Brother took a small puppy from friends - a cross between a spaniel and a mongrel. This was my first dog. And in the family, before my birth, my parents kept only cats. Everyone was glad that we had Rinetka. So we lived together, and everything was fine. My father liked to walk with a dog, and with retirement, and even more so - took Rinku and for about 3 hours they walked around the city.

After some time, I moved to my husband. One, without animals. This was never the case - parents love them, and even though I visited them several times every day, I could visit them. My husband and I also got a kitten six months ago, thoroughbred. More precisely, Aryush got me a birthday present as a surprise.

Everything would be good and wonderful, but before the New Year, my mother fell ill. Initially, she just caught a cold, but, without recovering, went to work, where it blew even harder. It all resulted in acute bronchitis with shortness of breath. Not even with shortness of breath - she was just choking. I was in the hospital and already then the doctors began to hint at first, and then directly say that there should be no animals in the house, since this is fraught with the most severe complications. Mom did not tell anyone about this for a long time, but at that moment I felt great - I can say, I was cured.

Everything again went into the usual rut, when suddenly another aggravation, another hospitalization. I was diagnosed with bronchial asthma. With such a diagnosis, of course, animals should be abandoned.

And here it was, at this moment I felt like a despicable creature. I was angry with my mother, although I understood that she was not to blame. I was angry with my husband, because I knew that he would not allow Rin'ka to take the cat and to us. And most importantly - I was angry with myself. And I'm still angry, I almost hate myself. Now my mother is in the hospital, my brother and father are looking for where to give animals, and I'm sitting at home and can not physically walk to my parents' apartment and just say goodbye to them. I'm roaring beluga and I just want to punch myself for that I'm such a rubbish. But I can not. How?! How will I look at them? How can I say goodbye?

I understand perfectly well that there is no other way out, that the life of my mother is more important. But my soul hurts for them - for a cat that has lived with us for 15 years and has pleased us every day. For a dog, which I always dreamed about and love, probably more than myself. I'm afraid for them. I'm afraid that they will be treated badly, I'm afraid that they will miss. I'm afraid that they will die. And I'm a creature. I'm a creature, because at the last minute they will not see me in their home. And because I can not do anything for them.