Fvck the police, except when?

Often as a Libertarian / Voluntaryist / Anarchist / Abolitionist / Agorist / {insert newest label here) I’m often the pretty confident about how to conduct my life without relying on the mechanisms of The State. Instead of calling the cops if I think my home might be getting broke into, I really on an arsenal of firearms and the knowledge on how to use them. Instead of Obamacare, I eat healthy, exercise and manage my stress levels. Instead of relying on Public School to teach my son what he needs to know I have compiled our own reading list and make sure we devote blocks of time almost everyday to digesting the books therein. That said, this past week I broke protocol when I called the cops on someone.

It was early Thursday afternoon, which was coincidentally 4/20. I work in the cannabis industry and was on the way to check in a with a business associate in South Denver before heading to Civic Center Park in downtown Denver for the festivities. As I merged onto I-25 from downtown Colorado Springs I ended up behind a brown Subaru, just a few years older than my own, being driven by a young man with spectacles, much like myself. For a moment, I thought “reminds me of myself, maybe he’s also on his way to Denver for 4/20”. Just as I thought that, he swerves quite erratically to the left, with the center of his vehicle over the line separating the lane from the shoulder of the interstate, only to remain hovering over the line for a few seconds until slowly but unmistakably drifting to the right only to do the same thing over the line separating the left from the right lane. It basically reminded me of skating a long half-pipe and doing grinds on either side. In other words, driving like a super drunk asshole. At first I thought “well maybe he dropped something”, but alas this kind of behavior continued past many exits and frankly after 5 miles or so, I started to get concerned, not only for my safety and his, but for the other cars or folks with whom we were sharing the road. I don’t know if he was drunk, dabbed out, epileptic, sleepy or what, but he was driving like a drunk driver in a DARE commercial from the 80’s. To me, being an Anarchist, means not aggressing against people’s free will, bodies, free or property and this dude seemed as if he’s about to wreck havoc on all three when he collides with any of the densely packe vehicles on the busy interstate (yes holiday 4/20 traffic is totally a thing). Images of a fiery wreck, dead people and ruined lives start to run amok in my head. This was obviously a problem and I started going through the inventory of possible solutions.

So I pondered my options, they were few. I could try and pull the gentleman over myself, but I had no flashing lights and me pointing a gun at him while yelling “pull over” is dumb for a multitude of reasons (the least of which not being that it makes no sense to shoot him, even if he refuses my request, as he will then be almost guaranteed to crash into a carload of innocents). Me following him and hoping that I could telekinetically keep him from crashing into the guardrail or other vehicles was about the best I could do without calling the so-called authorities. While I do have some faith in my ability to manifest reality, my faith in my ability to override whatever Karma/Dharma this apparently intoxicated guy was facing for whatever reason by prayer/magick alone wasn’t something I was willing to bet my life, or the life of others on. So guess what I did. Something I never do. Fucking Crikey. I called the cops.

Did I want to? No. Of the cops I am no fan. Having served some time and having been mistreated (but not as mistreated as some I saw) cops are not at the tops of my favorite list, as I recognize them to be institutional, extortion funded bullies. Would I have called a Privately Funded Security Force, such as a “Neighborhood Watch/Highway Patrol” if there was such a thing? YES! But at that moment, on that day, I couldn’t come up with a better option and was genuinely concerned that not only was this dude going to get himself killed but that he might take a car load or two of travelers with him. Some might argue that he was acting in a manner that displayed his disregard for the NAP, in that his carelessness could easily lead to the destruction of someone’s property, injury to their person and/or death. Some might argue that it was a “Statist” move to call the cops as he hadn’t aggressed against anyone, yet. Honestly, I’m kind of stuck in the middle and on one hand am almost disappointed in myself for resorting to using the violence of the state to get someone to act in accordance with my wishes. On the other hand, if that guy crashed into a carload of kids on their way to 420, or a family in a mini-van, or a construction worker on his way to a job site and I saw it coming but didn’t do anything about it, would I be complicit in helping this idiot driver in violating the NAP? At this point the question is less than rhetorical, I’m genuinely looking for input. There’s a part of me that feels as though I betrayed my principles of self-ownership by attempting to get the state involved. Then there’s the part of me that’s a parent that would have felt culpable should anyone else’s child had been killed by this dangerous dickhead of a driver, whom I recognized as potentially fatal yet did nothing about.

For the record, when I called the cops is was slightly after Monument (North bound) on my way to Denver. I followed the guy all the way to South Denver to where he was still in front of me, driving like a shitfaced asshole, until I exited onto C 470 West (about 40 minutes) and no cops ever pulled him over and hopefully he didn’t kill anyone later. I recognize it to be the slipperiest of slopes when we argue for using the aggression of the state to prevent other perceived potential aggressions, but frankly I didn’t know what else to do. That said, was there a better way to handle it and how would it be handled in a world of Spontaneous Order?

I hope my confessional doesn’t completely kill my anarchist-cred in your eyes, but this experience presented a very real quandary that I hope we can use our intellects and imagination to address so as to identify an effective stateless solution to make sure the free will, body and property of all is not aggressed against by intoxicated or reckless drivers.

To your feedback I look forward. Gratitude in advance. One Love.