I have a real problem, confessions of a disso abuser.
Today is June 9th 2017 and I am lucky to be alive, fuck research compounds and fuck 3-meo-pcp analouges, I ingested around 150mg of said compound(accidently) and I am lucky to be alive, I was hooked up to tubes and again my wonderful uncle/father had to rescue me. I am better then this, I have a grandma in intensive care, a thriving business and people generally care if I do good. I continue to put my own road blocks in life and what for? dumbness is all that ensues, I am going to be a better person I am going to be a better human, I am going to be a better activist. I need to, not for you random ass people but for me. I do not know what comes next, I am currently on bail on some ridiculous charges and its almost impossible to deal with, I feel like I am suffocating myself every time i breath but for what? just another day without substance X. I am a smart human I know this the world knows it, but why do i try to defeat my own shadows as soon as they come? why dont i make them my bitch? I do not know I am not afraid of gang members or police but I am afraid of what I can do to my self and its fucking brutal. why do i continue to do so? am I not able to differentiate between good and bad? I font know, I just need to steem my feelings. I have been sober for almost 24 hours now, meetings and more are on the way. I just pray and hope i practice what i preach for the first time. and the support i received from my friends and loved ones just make me feel just overwhelmed with love Im doing this for me guys not for you. just thank you for being patient with me
-anonymouse
I have learned we can be our own worst enemy. Learn to Love yourself. Learn what you are feeling. I am rooting for you. I am on this adventure of sobriety myself. I can honestly say my life is so much better. It's hard at the beginning, but it gets easier with each day that passes.
thank you so much for the kind words! only I can do this! but the support around me is overwhelming
You are right. Only you can do this. Community support really helps. It may be annoying, you may want people to go away...but one day you will look back and think "Damn, those people really cared for me and put up with my shit!", lol.