Travelman Northern Thailand: Impressions of Pai, Philosophy Jokes, and the Best Damn Buffet in all of Thailand!

All the backpackers say, "Pai is so fantastic! You HAVE to go!" "It was my favorite part of Thailand."

I went because I liked a lot of the people who were saying these things. And if I liked them, and they loved Pai, then the philosopher Plato would say it must follow that I love Pai.

This is the cabin I stayed in for 200 baht on the last night. Wish I would have found it the first day. It was an oasis in the alley in the middle of town...

Actually, Plato would have annoyingly put it in the form of a question, "Then does it not truly follow that Travelman loves Pai as well? When travelman drinks juice, does he not taste the same flavor other backpackers taste from the same juice?" Plato would have done very well at answering in the form of a question on Jeopardy. I don't know how well he'd do at answering correctly though, unless all the questions revolved around Ancient Greece. "I'll take Hemlock, for one thousand, Alex" -Oh, It's the Daily Do or Die. How much do you want to wager?

Plato would have also been good at responding to burns from fourth-graders. "Plato, you're a stink-butt!"

Plato responds, "I know you are, but what am I?" Then he'd bore them by droning into it, "I know you are a stink-butt, but what am I and what is stink?"

"Just give us the ball back, Plato!"

"What ball? Can you prove it exists? What is a ball? Does anything exist?"

I'm sorry for my digressions. You came here to see my Pai pictures and what not, and you're gonna get both! The what and the not...

Here's what I liked, then what I didn't like.

I liked that it was an easy place to be when you're feeling a little bit sick and scared you have the Thai plague. The town had restaurants, coffee shops, herbal tea shops, ice cream shops, western food, Indian food, Italian food. Everything was easy and in walking distance, nothing was too pricey, there was no stress.

I went to the best breakfast buffet in Thailand. It was at the Blue Ox Restaurant which was part of an upscale resort. They made their own jam, and served more than white bread to spread it on...

It was difficult for me to stop eating toast with jam. As soon as I discovered it, I stopped eating all the other great food. I may have eaten an entire loaf of wheat bread. It was merely a vessel for the jam! The coconut jam was out of this world! I couldn't wait for the day to be over after breakfast, I just wanted to get back to the buffet in the morning!

They had wheat and rye bread you slice yourself...

They had real coffee, tea, Thai tea, green tea, and not only real milk for your coffee, but hot milk! Many of the things I've listed are like spotting a leprechaun in Thailand. The picture's a little out of focus, I was excited...

Strawberry yogurt (Blueberry the next day), plain yogurt, pineapple juice, guava juice, chocolate milk, white milk, various cereals (one that said All Bran which I made myself eat). And they had dried strawberrys, dried tomatos, dried mangos, and dried cranberries (I put an assortment in my bran)...

They had pineapple, mango, and watermelon cut in a decorative manner, and fruit salad, ...and red dragon fruit and white dragon fruit!

Hard boiled eggs (you could order eggs any way you wanted them as well), noodles and chicken, chicken fried rice, and two other dishes...

They had a great salad building station, this picture is extra blurry because this is like finding a leprechaun riding a unicorn. Real lettuce, broccoli, peppers, two kinds of onions, tomatos, etc...

Here's some wide shots of the place. They had a coy pool with a fountain on the edge...

How much would you pay for this heaven on earth? I've paid three hundred baht for a breakfast buffet one tenth this good. This one, this one was 160 baht!!!! That's like $4.82 USD !!! If anything would make me love Pai, it was this buffet.

I also had this at the walking market...

And pizza bread similar to this, but it was on white bread. You could get meat and cheese or avocado, spinach and cheese, or avocado, tomato, and cheese. They were big on Avocado in Pai. You could order the lauded avocado toast at a few restaurants...

You could go get an Italian soda or a coffee and sit and drink it with bunny rabbits on your table. I took this pic in the morning, the white bunny was trying his best to do what rabbits do with the other two bunnies...

Here's what I didn't like. I felt like I wasn't even in Thailand. I could have been in a Northern California mountain town where all the employees are from Thailand. The place was all tourists, and it catered to them. It was nice to get food that wasn't Thai food for a change, but it was everywhere. There was a very bohemian chic, neo-hippie, pseudo-intellectual, upper middle class false non-conformity tendencies, crowd of all ages. I saw guys in their twenties and sixties wearing similar garb...

I see these people sitting around glad to party with like minded people of all ages, and talk about the special meaning your tattoo holds. I felt like a lot of these people were a bunch of phonies (I'm not Holden Caufield). They thought they were enlightened and open minded, but they were just jack ass consumers wanting to look and be cool in their sub-culture.

Traveling doesn't make you cool, it may expose you to new things, but if you're a dooche, you still filter the experience through your douchhe baggery. If I offend anyone here, tough. I've actually met people that I like, and they had bought the hippie pajama pants, but in Pai it was overwhelming and I felt like I was at a Phish concert (equally bad for me). So that's what I didn't like about Pai.

       $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

As always, thanks for stopping by. We hope you enjoyed the show, refreshments will be served in the lobby by the Kiwana's Club for a small donation.

Please resteem, upvote, and name your first born https://steemit.com/@travelman