Why is it PAINFUL to LOVE? (ULOG DAY 107)

Have you ever loved someone one-sidedly? How did it feel like? Was it painful? Did you ever hope that someday, the person whom you're in love with will look at you with eyes sparkling with love? --- wait, that last question made me cringe... sorry! XD

Alright, in this post, you'll get the chance to see the Hopeless Romantic side of me. Now, why all of a sudden, you may ask. Well, it's because of a certain song from Official髭男dism which they uploaded in their official YouTube account few days ago. Let me share the video below before we continue with the topic.

Please turn on the caption of the video above and choose the English subtitle.

The message of the song explains everything. There are times in life when we meet someone who we thought was the one or perhaps our soulmate, but it turns out that the longer we stay together... the longer we drag the pace... the hurtful it becomes.

I met someone like that almost 5 years ago. He was someone I look up to and we shared a lot of common interests. We get along so well that I just found myself falling for him. Unfortunately, he lives far away and eventually went home to his country. Yes, we kept in touch but as time passed by, the communication's frequency decreased.

We were not in that kind of relationship, by the way... although he told me that he likes me, it has always been one-sided on my part. Despite that, we continued our communication because we were friends, moreso, family.

Few years ago, it was difficult... I must say. There were times when I keep thinking of him and I suddenly feel sad. lol WTF! hahaha~ However, gone were those days. I don't expect for anything to happen anymore. We still keep in touch until now on some occasions.

I just got used to loving the fact that I loved him, for so long...

--- COMPLICATED, isn't it?


Now, it has been almost 5 years and I have completely ended that stage. Took me a long time, huh? lol However, I don't regret anything. I don't regret the feelings I had for the past years *(although it was one-sided). I enjoyed the roller coaster ride of feelings. I was happy, I was sad, I was longing, I was hurt... yet, I learned and I survived.

Loving someone, although painful, is a beautiful thing.

For now, I'm not longing to feel the same feelings, but I'm not closing my doors for it. However, I'll try to enjoy my life with the people surrounding me at the moment. My beautiful family, my lovely friends and my dearest anime. lol

Being able to talk about it with a happy heart is a great thing. Unlike the title of the song earlier (PRETENDER), I am genuinely happy with what's going on in my life... be it positive or negative. Thank you so much for reading and may you have a lovely day! じゃあね～