*Dealing with Toxic and Negative People so You Can Be Happy and Do Good Work*
So, you want to write a book, but all the people around you say you’re crazy?
Don’t listen to them.
Easier said than done though, right?
It’s easy to listen to the toxic talk, go with the flow, and forget your dream . On the other hand, it’s really difficult to ignore the toxic people in your life and follow your heart,
Like it or not, peer pressure has a huge impact on our thoughts, feelings and behaviour .Everyone has that friend or co-worker who sucks the energy right out of you, complaining about all the different ways the world is set against him or her. Unfortunately, you must deal with many different negative people throughout your life
Fortunately, there are ways to deal with negative people.
First, it’s time to say ‘goodbye’
Don’t wait until a toxic person in your life has brought you so far down that you forget how to get back up. You need to surround yourself with people who inspire you, encourage you and help you realize your potential.
“Life is simply too short to be friends with toxic individuals — and plus, there’s a lot of great people out there.”
If you’re looking to meet new like-minded positive people, consider volunteering — it’s not only a great life practice, but it’s a great way to surround yourself with happier attitudes.
Then, set limits (especially with complainers)
Granted, there are people who you can’t eliminate from your life (at least not right away), like co-workers or bosses. Thankfully, there are some proven ways to protect your positive attitude from the influence of others, even if you’re stuck with them for 8+ hours a day.
Complainers and negative people are bad news because they wallow in their problems. Often, they want people to join their negativity party. And, often we feel pressure to listen to these negative individuals because we don’t want to be seen as rude, but there’s a huge difference between lending a sympathetic ear and getting sucked into others’ negative emotional tornadoes.
You can avoid all this by setting limits and distancing yourself when possible. Think of it this way: if the negative person was smoking instead, would you sit there inhaling the second-hand smoke?
No — you’d distance yourself, and you should do the exact thing same with toxic people. A great way to set limits is to ask complainers how they intend to fix the problem. They will either stop their negativity or redirect the conversation towards positivity.
Avoid lecturing or preaching to the person. Long-term friendships or work relationships with negative people can drain your patience just as much as your time and energy, but it’s important to avoid lecturing or preaching at the person.Even the most positive among us aren’t great at accepting criticism, and a negative person is more likely to see it as evidence that you’re also against her or him rather than taking the feedback constructively.
Choose your battles
Don’t engage every time someone irritates you or tries to bring you into their negativity.
Not only will you be seen as argumentative, you’ll be welcoming the toxicity into your own space. Rather than argue, try to ignore any negative comments. For instance, when a coworker starts complaining, say you have work to do rather than changing your mind or pretending to agree with them.
Work on your emotional intelligence and prevent the situation from escalating. Walk away from unnecessary conflict — you’ll be respected for taking the high road
Make someone else smile
President Obama said that “if you go out and make some good things happen, you will fill the world with hope, you will fill yourself with hope.”
That’s more than just a pretty speech. Consider someone else’s happiness — the good news is that positive attitudes are also contagious.
Multiple scientific studies have shown that paying it forward not only makes others feel better, but creates long-lasting feelings of joy within yourself, and can provide that much-needed boost to your overall mood.
Bring some donuts into work. Offer people coffee. Offer to help with a project. Do what you can to get the whole team beaming, and they’ll do the same for you.
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